No I will not bow down to the internal perpetrator today.
You see once upon a time there was a wild little wolf loving girl who was loved deeply by many close to her and at the same time she was also emotionally and verbally abused by someone else close to her. One of the abusers criticized everything about her-the way she spoke,
Ate, expressed, sang, created and the way her Body looked.
So today I found myself looking at some surf pics of me in my element, communing with the ocean in one of the most sacred meditations I know and a host of stories criticizing my body flooded in. The external perpetrator becomes the internal perpetrator at times and offers only one self critical and defeating story- or a trance of unworthiness that I buy into sometimes. I haven’t posted this pic for a longtime because of that.
But Not today.
I see myself in my element
I see my Body taking a deep breath
I see my focus
I see I’m looking down the line and slaying some backside -skills I’ve worked hard for!!
I see my strong shoulders that can paddle and love and carrying the sick and dying
I see my strong legs that carry me up mountains
I see my passion and respect for the ocean
I see a woman privileged to travel
I see a beautiful, resilient, tender,
Fragile, messy, magical me
This post is about all of us and the ripple effect of patriarchy, misogyny, symbolic annihilation,
invisibility and our innate capacity to RECLAIM. RECLAIM. RECLAIM.
I see you and I care about moments where you challenge self loathing,
Defeating stories, messages that have been internalized and you find a bridge, a way to reclaim.
If you feel called to share some of these precious moments of reclamation- where you challenged a story and loved yourself in some way to undo the trance of unworthiness I would be honoured to hear and celebrate you and if not,
I respect and celebrate you.
I hope that you have good folks around you that support you in remembering the truths when you forget.
#laupavia #queersurfer #queer #outinthelineup #reclaim #metoo
#strongwoman #surferwoman #surfergirl #surfsister #wildwoman #lesbianwholift #lgbtq🌈 #selflove #healingjourney #athleticwoman #fitqueer #tomboy